Sarah's Blog

So a little about me and my background.

I'm a 40 year old single mum, divorced for 10 years and my beautiful though stressful children are 14 and 11 years old. I am a mature student studying my first degree after an accident led to me losing my job. This has left me with a lifetime medical condition that I manage sometimes badly everyday, but I manage. I have been through some very tough times in my life, my now ex husband leaving me and my two children homeless and having to restart our lives not once but now twice.

I have had a problem with my weight since I was 23 years old. I have tried every diet under the sun, sometimes to the point where I have ended up in hospital. Please know I have been desperate enough to lose weight that I have damaged my own life in the process. Now I look at life in a different way, well I am trying to. I want to make my life to be about the things I am going to achieve. I don't want my life to be just something that passes me by anymore. I am making small changes to make my life relavent. I don't want to be stick thin anymore. I don't want to be like the women I see on TV.

I do however want to be healthy and happy. I know that I am going to slip up and old habits will rear their ugly heads but I am human, I will make mistakes but the time has come to accept that I am gonna trip up but if I fall I can pick myself up, dust myself off and get back in the game. I know I am one of many who feel like we have been dealt a rough hand but maybe I should start by picking the cards for my hand in the future. Take back some control in my life and make it count for me. I will laugh at some things and I will break down and cry at other things but they will all mark my path and hopefully be a story I tell when I am old and grey (L'Oreal is covering up the grey for now). Hopefully I can share some of these if not all of these things with everyone else.

You can catch my previous blog posts here

Blog 16

Three weeks, that’s it!!!! Just three weeks till I get to have my gallbladder taken out and my hernia fixed. Yes, half my problems will be over in just three weeks then I can focus on getting healthy and fit again. So much has changed since we spoke last month, I was offered two of my surgeries which will mean a pain free existence. You have no idea how excited I am about that. I have met my surgeon after being called into his office for a very brief meeting and an explanation of what will happen in my surgeries. Naturally a hospital appointment can’t go without some blunder or mishap and laying on a bed in a tiny office with a strange man prodding you is not where you want blunder or mishap to happen. So, I am lying there with my now loose jeans pulled down looking like a weirdly drunken date in a parking lot. I know my hernia is nasty and needs sorting but what I don’t expect is for the surgeon with over 20 years’ experience to take one look at my hernia and say’s ‘Oh Jesus’ out loud and then recoil away slightly. This is what he did, yes that’s right folks my hernia is so disgusting that even a professional was freaked out by it. Once he has regained his composure and I am allowed to put my clothes to their normal position on my body and regaining some form of dignity back he informs me that yes, my hernia must be sorted out as soon as possible, oh yeah and he will do the gallbladder too. The thing that causes me daily agonising pain came second on his list and my freak show looking hernia was what he really wanted to slice up. Still once it’s fixed I will be able to stand up straight and not look like John Hurt from Alien which will be nice and he promised my stomach would have a pretty smile shaped scar. He runs through all the complications that can happen and then assures me this is highly unlikely as I am very healthy (I don’t feel reassured). So, I leave the hospital feeling very happy that two of three surgeries are being performed soon.

Ok Monday this week has definitely been my best day in a long time.  Today was my driving test. I love driving, I really do. I have a great driving instructor who has helped me so much with my driving after an awful experience with a previous instructor. Well my driving instructor has been amazing and taught me so well whilst having some excellent discussions and putting the world to rights each lesson. So naturally I was gonna pass the test and I did, FIRST TIME. Yep I passed first time and that’s thanks to my amazing instructor because I really thought I may fail once I found out that my test instructor had the same name as my ex-husband and anyone who knows me well enough, knows that there is something about that name that sends me over the edge of sanity and I tend to freak out and hide. But he was a decent guy and a great test instructor and he didn’t make me nervous at all. When he told me I had passed once we got back to the test centre I didn’t even say a bad swear word just a regular normal one.

Oh, and did I mention that I thought giving up smoking was a good idea the week before my test? Well I have decided all my bad habits should go so smoking was next on the list really. I booked in down at the smoking clinic and they gave me lots of patches and inhalators and so on. Now if I could just remember to put the patches on it might help. I haven’t had a cigarette so really, I don’t think it matters if I wear the damn patches or not as I don’t seem to be wanting to smoke anyway. But hey ho, the docs are pleased with me for giving up and everything seems to be moving along nicely right now.
So really this is my best month so far, I am still losing weight, I am gonna be pain free after my two surgeries on the 16th May, I have given up smoking and I passed my driving test. Yep this month has rocked for sure. Right me and my freak show hernia are end it here for the night. Happy thoughts to you all and mucho love as always.

 

 

 

 

 

 

To contact Sarah email blog@bigmatters.co.uk and subject line of Sarah
Sarah is an independant blogger, the views and personal opinions expressed in blogs are soley those of the original authors and other contributors.
These views and opinions do not represent those of Big Matters and/or any/all contributors to this site.

 

 


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